State Employees & Cats

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats are.  The first man was an
Engineer, the second man was an Accountant, the third man was a Chemist,
the fourth was a Government Employee.

To show off, the Engineer called to his cat, “Tsquare, do your stuff.”
T-square pranced over to a desk, took out some paper and a pen and promptly
drew a circle, a square, and a triangle.  Everyone agreed that was pretty

But the Accountant said his cat could do better.  He called his cat and
said, Spreadsheet, do your stuff.”  Spreadsheet went out into the kitchen
and returned with a dozen cookies.  He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3
cookies each.  Everyone agreed that was good.

But the Chemist said his cat could do better.  He called his cat and said,
“Measure, do your stuff.” Measure got up, walked over to the fridge, took
out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured
exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop.  Everyone agreed that was good.

Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, “What can
your cat do?” The Government Worker called to his cat and said, “Coffee
Break, do your stuff.” Coffee Break jumped to his feet, ate the cookies,
drank the milk, crapped on the paper, screwed the other three cats, claimed
he injured his back while doing so, filed a grievance report for unsafe
working conditions, put in for Workers Compensation and went home for the
rest of the day on sick leave.

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